Thursday, October 30, 2008

Embracing simplicity or dumbing down?

Ah, Corporate America. I just came home from a day-long meeting to find that I have run afoul of a language policy. Little ol' me, Ann Podolske, daughter of an English teacher, Midwestern to the marrow and rule-follower to the nth degree, has crossed a line.

A simple line.

We are supposed to keep our communications simple, and that is a wonderful aim. A lot of what used to be distributed in the name of communication at Big Company was as engaging as a last will and testament. Of the stodgy, old school, our-verbal-density-is-the-sign-we-mean-business school of writing. Not engaging in the least.

So we all need to strive to avoid stodginess. Verbal diarrhea. Denser-than-lead sentences.

Got it! Endorse it!! You're signing my song!!!

But how simple is simple? Well, that's today's question, because I used the phrase "veritable cornucopia" to describe a newsletter, and that phrase was decreed not simple enough.

Am guessing the word "veritable" was the culprit, but who knows? I've had the word "cornucopia" drilled into my brain since childhood, as it features heavily in every story of the first Thanksgiving I've ever heard. But maybe people don't hear about cornucopias any more.

Is that it?

Harrumph.

I'm guessing I should have said, "There's a lot of good stuff in the newsletter." Or maybe: "Lots inside!"

But I'm not writing copy for Wal-Mart, I'm writing for professionals in a major corporation.

Professionals who can't grasp words like "veritable" and "cornucopia," in the opinion of one reviewer. I thought they could handle it.

Who's right? Well, they are, I guess. They changed the sentence, and I should report here what they changed it to, but I can't. Right. Now.

Am trying to think happy, positive thoughts, remember? ("The Secret" tells me so.)

So let me get this out: ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH!

Now I feel better.

Tuesday, October 28, 2008

Time to get back to (The Comedy) business

Things still are a bit up in the air at home (check out our CaringBridge site for details), but I've decided it's time to act "as if" life is returning to normal, even if we're not there. Yet.

Not that "normal" is what we're really aiming for, if you know what I mean.

Since I last posted here (in July!), I've become a married lady. Well, married lesbian. (My mother was a lady--me, I'm a woman who is called "Sir" on a regular basis.) Swept up in the romance of Linda's impending surgery, we decided to get hitched because many of our lesbian friends said it would make a big difference to the hospital staff if we were.

Yes, it was mostly a practical move. What do you expect from two women who have been together over 15 years, eh?

And while this is almost as embarrassing as admitting I own a Tony Little Gazelle, I also have been trying to adopt the practices suggested in "The Secret."

(Judge me at your peril, people. 8-)

No, we're not yet awash in health (focus #1) or wealth (#2), but we're doing really great on the love front. And my carcass is far less creaky, as I continue to tell myself that it's as perfect and flexible as a child's.

The only downside of this business is that after a nine-month absence, my period has come back to visit. Need to revise that mental focus a bit, perhaps. Maybe I should focus on having a body that's a perfect and flexible as a child's--with 49-year-old ovaries.

We shall see.